Mate Preference
His main area of study has been human
desires, what people want when they are
looking for a husband or wife. To
research this, he surveyed over ten thousand
people in thirty-seven cultures
on six continents. What his findings show is
that men tend to choose mates
more on physical attractiveness and youth. While
women seek men with more
financial power. Now this may come as no surprise to us
in America, because
men here have always wanted women who were more physically
attractive, and
women have always wanted to marry a rich man, like a doctor or a
lawyer. What
Buss found out is that it is also similar in other cultures. How a
man’s
wealth is determined may vary, but the man’s desirability is the
same.
From his studies and what he has gathered from past information, he
has put
together a good theory that explains why we have our preferences for
a mate the
way we do. It dates back to our ancestors, some of the first
humans. The main
goal for them was to survive. To do this men wanted to have
as many children as
they could. Women wanted men who could protect them. For
them the man’s wealth
was measured by his social status, strength, and
ability to fight (to protect
themselves). From generation to generation these
traits were inherited, written
deep down in our subconscious. The
characteristics men look for in women are:
skin tone, symmetry in the face,
clear skin (acne can be a pre-indicator of high
testosterone levels, which
could mean they may have ovarian dysfunction), and a
low hip-to-waist ratio.
This ratio is the 36-24-36 measurements. This certain
hip to waist ratio is a
strong indicator that the woman is more fertile, and
thus able to have more
children. The reason men want younger women as their
choice for mates is that
because they’re younger, once again they can produce
more children. Of course
now they’re not as interested in having a large
family, but these standards,
throughout history, have never changed. The most
beautiful supermodels have
these certain measurements. The models who are
extremely skinny usually
aren’t considered as sex symbols. Women today still
look for that doctor or
lawyer, the kind of guy that will keep them supported
financially. They do
this because of those subconscious thoughts we inherited
from our ancestors -
to be able to protect their family. A man with lots of
financial power will
be able to support a family easily, making the woman’s
job as a mother
easier. People in positions of power, generally men, have people
who will do
anything to fulfill their desires, just because of their status. A
good
example is President Clinton and Monica Lewinsky. Now, not all women
are
looking to try to date Bill Gates, but you’ll find most women do want a
guy
who has done somewhat well in life. All these things don’t mean that men
are"sexist pigs," and that women are "gold diggers," it just explains why
we
do have these tendencies. It also helps to explain relationships as a
whole.
Women are looking more into a long-term relationship. This would
help in raising
a successful family. It is also the reason most women will
usually forgive a guy
for cheating on them once, just as long as they’re not
falling in love with
another girl (or guy). Because if the man was falling in
love with someone else,
then her perfect family would be wrecked. Men are
usually thinking about a
short-term relationship. The reason behind this is
because back in the days of
our ancestors, the male needed to produce many
children to keep his family
strong. The more women he had to mate with, the
more children he could have.
Most men aren’t thinking about having all
those children anymore, but there
have been some cases where rich businessmen
had sex with many women because they
wanted to have children. They needed to
prove that they could support all of
them. Men tend to become more upset if
they realize their mate has been sleeping
with someone else, than if their
mate is falling in love with someone else. The
reasoning behind this is, if a
woman will have sex with other guys, who’s to
say that the man’s child is
really his. Women obviously know they are the
mother, but there can always be
that small doubt for men. Men have a whole
agenda for getting women to have
sex with them. Because of this, many women have
been the victims of all sorts
of types of abuse. But ultimately, how things work
out are all really
controlled by women’s sexual agenda. If they would only
have sex with men who
walked on their hands, it wouldn’t be long before all
the men are walking
around upside down. Buss describes love as a way for men and
women to bond so
they can mate. He sees love as a commitment of remaining
faithful, sticking
up for each other, reproduction resources, physical and
emotional protection,
and the giving of gifts and economic resources. In
conclusion, Buss’s survey
of different cultures and research in the field of
sexual desires and human
mating has led to the gathering of important
information. Many other
psychologists have used what he has learned and
published to continue work in
this field. His research has helped to give us a
greater understanding about
ourselves.
Bibliography
U.S. News and World Report (July 19,
1993): title-The Mating Game, written by
William F. Allman. ? Miami
Herald (Jan. 27, 1998): title-Power and Sex,
written by Curtis Morgan. ?
Toronto Star (April 30, 1994): title Crazy
Little Thing Called Love,
written by Debra Black. ?
http://www.psy.utexas.edu/psy/FACULTY/BussD/bussD.html