Wives with Cheating Husbands Can Gain the Upper Hand
Infidelity expert tells wives with cheating husbands how to work quietly behind the scenes to gain the upper hand and make the best of a bad situation.
(PRWEB) February 22, 2005 -- “Most wives with cheating husbands simply suffer
in silence or tolerate their husband’s infidelity”. says Ruth Houston,
infidelity expert and author of Is He Cheating on You? – 829 Telltale Signs.
“They feel they have no other alternatives, or don’t know what else to
do.”
“You don’t have to sit back and be a helpless victim,” says Houston,
whose website www.InfidelityAdvice.com provides practical advice for victims
of infidelity. “There are things you can do to make the best of a bad situation
and minimize the damage infidelity can cause.”
Houston urges wives with
cheating husbands to take steps to protect themselves emotionally, sexually,
legally and financially. She counsels them to work quietly behind the scenes to
offset many of the negative consequences that result from
infidelity.”
Take control of the situation,” advises Houston. “Whether
you stay with your husband or leave him, the guidelines below will help you gain
the upper hand.”
Make sure infidelity is the problem you’re dealing with.
Problems like drug or alcohol addiction or gambling often masquerade as
infidelity because of similar telltale signs. Don’t speculate, investigate. If
you need to get solid proof of infidelity without spending a lot of time or
money, a book like Is He Cheating on You? (Lifestyle Publilcations $29.95, ISBN
0-9720553-4-7) which lists practically every known sign of infidelity will help
you find out for sure.
Face reality.
Ignoring your husband’s
infidelity will not make it go away. It will only make things worse. He could
become so attached to his mistress that it will be impossible to get your
marriage back on track.
Speak up and take a stand.
If you know he’s
cheating and say nothing about it, you're enabling his infidelity. Make it clear
that you disapprove of what's going on and tell him you want it to stop. Not
addressing his infidelity makes him think he has your silent approval or that
you don’t know what’s going on.
Let him know you know.
Affairs thrive
in secrecy. If you’ve identified numerous telltale signs and have solid proof of
your husband’s infidelity, decide when and how to tell him you know about his
affair. Sometimes just knowing his infidelity has been exposed will be enough to
make him stop.
Build a support team.
You need someone to confide in
about your husband’s infidelity. Don’t try to get through this alone. Surround
yourself with people who care about you and have your best interests at heart.
Realistically evaluate your situation.
Consider your options. Is your
marriage worth saving? Should you get a temporary separation? File for divorce?
What is it in your (and your children’s) best interest to do?
Seek
counseling for yourself and for your marriage.
You have a better chance of
saving your marriage if you get professional help. You’ll be better equipped to
deal with the trauma of infidelity if you seek individual counseling, as well.
Identify the underlying issues.
Try to pinpoint the contributing
factors to his infidelity - A life crisis? Major character flaws? Sexual
addiction? Dissatisfaction with you or with the marriage? Or something else? Get
to the root of the problem, if you can.
Protect yourself sexually.
Your husband’s infidelity can have life-threatening consequences for you. If
he’s cheating, your health is at risk. You’re already a victim of infidelity.
Don’t become a victim of HIV/AIDS too.
Find out your legal rights.
Consult an attorney who specializes in matrimonial law. Get a clear
understanding of what you're legally entitled to (alimony, child support,
division of marital assets) in the event of a divorce or separation.
Put
your financial house in order.
Get a realistic view of your current
financial situation and make the necessary adjustments. Establish credit in your
own name. Set up a separate checking or savings account. Start putting money
aside for a rainy day.
Make sure you’re equipped to earn a living.
Many women remain in adulterous relationships because they’re financially
dependant on their husbands. If you need to, take college courses or start
learning a trade to make yourself employable.
Prepare yourself mentally
and emotionally.
Accept the possibility that your marriage may end. Don’t be
caught off guard. Have an “Infidelity Game Plan” in place in case your husband
decides to move out or ask for a divorce. Begin formulating your strategy
now.
Break free of the bonds of infidelity. Focus your energy and efforts
on the positive things you can do to make the best of a bad situation. Empower
yourself by acting on these suggestions and you’ll gain the upper
hand.
To receive a FREE Special Report entitled “5 Things You Shouldn’t
Do If He’s Cheating on You”, send an e-mail to: e-mail protected from spam bots
(InfidelityAdvice at gmail.com) with "5 Things" in the subject line.
©
Copyright 2005 Ruth Houston. All rights reserved.
About the
Author
Infidelity expert Ruth Houston is the author of Is He Cheating on
You?-829 Telltale Signs, a comprehensive guide which documents practically every
known sign of infidelity. She has been quoted in the New York Times, the Toronto
Sun, the New York Post, Cosmopolitan, the Christian Science Monitor, the
Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, Marie Claire and numerous other publications here and
abroad. Ruth has also been a guest on Good Day New York, TalkAmerica, Telemundo,
BBC, The Breakfast Club, Caracol Radio Network, ClearChannel Network, the Mike
Gallagher Show, and 1010WINS and over 100 radio and TV talk shows in the US,
Europe, South America, and the Caribbean.
In addition to writing about
infidelity, Ruth also conducts seminars on infidelity and does 1-on-1 infidelity
consultations by e-mail, private chat (IM) or by phone. To schedule an
individual infidelity consultation with Ruth Houston, or to request information
on fees or consultation times, send an email to e-mail protected from spam bots
(InfidelityAdvice at gmail.com)with “consultation” in the subject line. For more
information on infidelity, visit http://www.InfidelityAdvice.com
MEDIA:
To
interview Ruth Houston, please call 718 592-6039 or email Ruth at e-mail
protected from spam bots (InfidelityExpert at gmail.com) For more information on
infidelity, visit the PRESS ROOM at http://www.InfidelityAdvice.com
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Source : http://www.prweb.com/releases/2005/2/prweb210936.htm